Read part 1 of our Domestic Violence series and part 2 on Domestic Violence Signs.

Everyone needs to be familiar with Domestic Violence signs and red flags, which we discussed in our previous article.

Those who have never been in an abusive relationship need to recognize the signs. That way, they can act quickly if they or someone they care about are ever in a situation of abuse.

A Message to The Victims of Domestic Violence

Of course, those who are being abused need to know the signs so that they can stop denying the abuse and admit it to themselves. They need to get to a point where they stop feeling guilty and recognize that the abuse is not their fault. There is a long but necessary journey in accepting that it is the abuser’s personality and shortcomings that have caused the situation, that they do not deserve this type of treatment, and that it is the abuser who is responsible for his or her behaviour. It is during this stage of realization and acceptance that most people decide to get out of the relationship. [i] These red flags may help them get to the point where they chose to get out of the relationship.

View our list of Domestic Violence Ressources and Emergency Action Plan.

Victime de violence conjugale dans l'obscurité

A Warning Message to All

Men, if you notice one of your friends acting this way with their spouse, you need to keep him or her accountable. And they need professional help. If you turn a blind eye, you are part of the problem. Ladies, if one of your friends treats her or his partner this way, then you need to check their behavior and encourage them to seek counseling.  Sadly, women are not the only ones abused, men are too.  They are also less likely to admit it and to seek help.[ii]

WITNESSES, PLEASE CALL FOR HELP

If you ever witness abuse taking place or think you may be hearing abuse taking place through your walls or windows, please call the police for help on the person’s behalf even if it is a regular occurrence. Especially if it is a regular occurrence… Call every single time. You may save their life.  Only intervene if you feel that it is safe for you to do so.  The abuser may turn his or her aggression towards you.  In some cases, even the victim can turn on you (this happens for complex reasons which will not be explored in the article).

View our list of Domestic Violence Ressources and Emergency Action Plan.

 

Written by: Tara Grenier, M.Sc., CAT(C), Injury Prevention Professional at the Montreal General Hospital- McGill University Health Centre
[i]https://www.healthline.com/health/battered-woman-syndrome#stages

[ii] https://www.reuters.com/article/us-health-domestic-violence-men-idUSKCN1UC2EF

 

 

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